I think we are all kind of guilty of this. We have an image of a perfect spouse based on what we read, what we “think ” we see in other people and what we have experienced. As a result , we build up certain image of who an ideal mate is.
Why cant he help around the house the way my dad does?
Why cant we be super duper dope in his dressing the way Tunde is?
Why cant she be a firebrand prayer warrior the way sister Tamedu is?
Bisi gave birth and has flat tummy without stretch marks but She has a bulgy tummy filled with marks. It irritates me .
The list goes on and on from the minute to the very large demands.
We cant seem to get over the fact that they don’t fit into that box that we want them to.
The more we brood over them, the more we become sad and disappointed and the more it kills our joy.
In a not so perfect marriage situation, if we looked at them the way God looks at them, we might have a different perspective.
We sin and offend God and he is upset and let’s us know via His spirit but He doesn’t cast us away. He keeps calling and calling , never getting tired. He prods, pushes , send people to us, speak to our heart, etc. When we eventually come home, he embraces us fully. He doesn’t condone our sins but forgives us when he come to Him.
Managing expectations is not condoning bad behaviour but thinking as God would think when dealing with a child you has gone astray.
Think about it!